Well, let's back this ol' blog up and talk about yesterday. I went to the gym (as per the norm) with polka dot gym bag in tow. The plan was to run errands after the gym including VDay gifts and grocery. Since I am now very aware of how it feels to NOT have a shower while running errands after sweating like a man, my gym bag held the necessities for a quick shower and change of clothes...oops, wait, did I forget something?
You know that feeling, right? When you are halfway to your destination - too far to turn around - and you have that nagging sensation that you are forgetting something? Well, my nag started before I left the house - I felt...I don't know...undone. Like I was missing something. But I carried on and headed out.
About the time I was getting off at the exit that would eventually lead to the gym, I realized what it was I was missing...a bra. Sorry, boys, if this is uncomfortable but guess what, this is what us ladies wear and there's nothing dirty about it. Well, unless you have to wear your SPORTS BRA after sweating profusely and drowning every inch of the material!
So, yes, I took a shower after 30 min of hard cardio and weight lifting. As usual, I went into the little stall to change into my towel wrap and headed into the shower. As usual, there were random hair patches clinging to the wall and soap holder. Puke! Nothing grosses me out more - well, other than the time I forgot my shower flops (flip flops for the shower) and had to walk on tile that had mysterious who-knows-what all over it. Ok, so maybe it was just water..but STILL! Yeah, the hair clumps in the shower...I swear I could see where a message was written on the stall wall in Sharpie stating "Sasquatch was here."
Anyway, after dodging the hair balls, I finished my shower and worked my way back to the changing stalls (sounds like I go to a barn everyday to work out). There are two - a larger one and a smaller one. I am usually lucky enough to grab the larger one. The smaller one is broken. The latch to lock it works but the door and the frame don't fit. Not sure how the hell that happened but it did. Well, guess which one I was stuck with - you guessed it, didn't you. The small one with no locking/closing capabilities. Granted it is tucked away in a corner with the other stall but I am one modest freak. I knew that, if the person in the larger stall came out, they would see me in all my glory (or lack thereof). And, if the door is cracked like it will be because it doesn't shut, what if someone thinks that stall is vacant and decides to throw open the door to come inside. It was quite stressful!
I did my best using one hand to hold the door shut by the small coat hook on the inside while I used the other hand to apply deoderant, towel dry my hair and get dressed. The only time I had to completely let go was to put on my soaked and wet sports bra that I so disgustingly sprayed lightly with perfume. I know, I know. But it was the only thing I could think of to help me feel better about putting on a sweat soaked sports bra under a thick turtle neck cable sweater.
Once I left the gym I was famished. Not sure if I got a better work out from my cardio and weights or if I was just exhausted from my Cirque de Soleil act holding the door shut in the small stall. Whatever the case, I headed straight for Subway which is about a mile, if that, from the gym.
Now, Subway is my lunch of choice after working out if I am by myself. I usually get the 6" veggie delight with lite mayo, sunchips and an iced tea. Very low in cals and fat. Which Subway I go to highly depends on the errands I need to run and where those errands are located. Since I was heading down Grant, I figured I would hit the one right there on my way to the other two or three stops I had that direction.
As I walked into the door, I noticed something very different about this Subway. Part of their job requirement at all Subways is to welcome you when you walk in the door. These folks practically threw their sliced onions like confetti to do a Forrest Gump style wave and welcome me to Subway. Ummm, thanks. Then, the lady came over to take my sandwich order and was more than pleasant and cheerful. She asked what I would be having and, utilizing my lame comedic mind, I responded, "whatever you've had." Ok, after the many attempts of humor at the docs office only to crash and burn, I figured that this, too, would be lost - floating over heads and into the bread warmer. Nope! I just hit it big in my comedic profession (or hobby, as it seems). Her and the two other boys that were working the make stand busted out in jolly laughs that directed all guests' eyes to me. Not quite the laugh I was expecting. Just a courtesy would have been ok in this situation. Subway restaurants are not that big.
So after cheerfully making my sandwich and ha ha'ing while taking my money, I ate my sandwich quietly in the corner ignoring all the eyes on me as if I were some dead beat comedian trying for a comeback. So this is what it feels like on the D List, huh Kathy Griffin?
As I was leaving I received a beautiful, loud and energetic "thank you for choosing Subway, have a nice day." How nice. Those folks definitely enjoyed their jobs. Sure they joked and conversed with every guest that came in after me and, I'm sure, before me but they made each of us feel...special. Made me wonder if there is a happy medium between the zit faced boy who wants to throw a cup of hot coffee in your face because he hates his McD's life so bad and the hyped on Red Bull college students that want to serve you your sandwich on a silver platter because you're the BEST! Really! They mean it! Is there a happy medium between the two?
Grocery shopping was uneventful other than another Dawna-ism. I went into Walmart planning only to purchase my non-perishables and then head to Fry's to get my produce (Walmart tends to have nasty produce). Back track a bit - on my way to Walmart, I needed to pee so stupendously bad that I thought I wouldn't make it. It was quite a drive with a couple of stops in between that didn't have public restrooms. So I finally make it to Walmart. As I walk in, Mr. Retired rolls me a cart with a welcoming smile. I had no time for carts. I had to get to the restroom before Mr. Retired had to mop up a spill. I told him I would come back for a cart. I think he said something as I hurried past him (probably "thanks for shopping Walmart" or something). I was on a mission to get straight to the potty room with little to no incident.
Now, most of you reading my blog know me well (so sorry you have to know me this well) so you know that it can't just end there. And it certainly cannot be that easy! As I approached the bathroom, I noticed that the men's was wide open but the women's had a cleaning buggy with a sign saying the bathroom was closed for cleaning!! Are you really kidding me right now? I thought, well, maybe I could stick my head in to ask the lady if I could just sneak a quick pee if I promise not to make a mess of the nasty Walmart bathroom!! But, when I peaked in, I saw two old unkempt men, one with a chewed up straw hanging out of his mouth, sitting on the sinks talking to one another. I felt like a cartoon character where my eyes went bulging out of my head and my jaw dropped just short of the WMart bathroom floor. I wasn't sure what to do and I felt like I was stumbling over my own thoughts as my eyes were watering from having to GO!
The sign on their buggy said something about a family restroom in the back. I looked toward the back of the store and saw that ray of light which was the restroom sign. But it felt like it kept zooming away from my glance and I knew that the walk would be painstakingly long - I mean, really painstaking!
Then my brain kicked in. If I am going to walk all the way back there, I might as well get a cart to take with me and I would start my shopping from the back of the store forward. I left my bio friendly bags in the car because I am only inclined to use my bio friendly bags for produce, dairy, meats and frozen since they are designed to keep foods cold. And, since I wasn't planning on buying perishables at W Mart, I left them in the car. So, I headed back to the sliding doors that housed Mr. Retirement. He rolled a cart my way and said "welcome to Walmart." Umm, thanks Mr. Magoo. I've already been here...oh well. No biggie. Thanks for the cart. I almost rode my cart all the way to the back of the store - knocking women and small children out of my way in every aisle. I couldn't get there fast enough. Finally, the family restroom...with a door that doesn't lock! Seriously!?!
As much as I cared at the gym about other women seeing me peel on a sweaty sports bra in the locker room, I didn't care if Mr. Retirement himself saw me coppin' a squat. I had to GOOOO!!!
Finally, I felt much better and was ready to finish my errands. I wasn't much in a grocery shopping mood and wanted to get it all done ASAP. It was a big trip to replenish our daily staples. As I made my way up to the produce section, I noticed that it didn't look too bad and they had my favorite dark red grapes. Hmm, maybe I will save myself yet another stop and just get everything there. Oh crap, the bags. So, yes...be it that I am Dawna and must make things difficult...or just humorous...I dropped my cart in front of the fresh flower bin. I headed out the sliding doors and passed, yet again, Mr. Magoo the Retired Man. He thanked me for shopping Walmart. I was about to say I would be back but decided not to bother. He would welcome me again when I returned. Which he did and rolled me another cart. Whatev.
Shopping went well until I started feeling sweaty. I am not a good shopper - especially now that I am living off of T's income. As my cart fills up, my sweat glands respond and I start feeling weak and shakey. Afraid of the total at the end of the trip. But it ended up not being as bad as I had anticipated and we are well stocked with staples (not those kind).
The only thing that frustrated me - well, not the only thing - was that I asked the little college drop out boy at the register to hand me the cold items so that I could put them in their special bags. He said ok...but then didn't!! He kept handing me my cold items that were smashed into plastic bags for me to place in their special bags. Ok, I will deal with that. As long as my frozen and dairy items are all in there. Well, when I got home I noticed that "drop out" must have lost his sense of touch somewhere along the way. There were random tubs of yogurt mixed in with the cat snack cans and a tub of hummus mixed in with canned goods! Uggh! If I get sick, I am going to kick that boy's butt back to grade school!
Here's the other thing. Dear Tucson Drivers...I know it must be hard to live in the heat like we do. The sun always shining in your eyes and the cactus always pricking your rears. But, really, the driving is dismal. I can deal with the laying on your horn right as the light turns green and I get entertained watching the occasional road rage chase down Ina. But, when it comes to parking lots, something has to give!! I have never seen anything like it. Someone begins pulling out of their spot and almost gets side swiped from a car going 20 mph in an attempt to make them wait! Folks, let me fill you in on the facts. Granted we should look behind us and in all areas that we can see from our driver windows and mirrors before pulling out. I get that and agree. The fact of the matter is, someone in a sports car, sedan or economy car that is parked between the cowboy pick up trucks or the road rage four wheelers CANNOT see your speeding a^% barreling through the parking lot. Do as us good Southern folks do and LET THEM OUT! It doesn't take very long and maybe, just maybe, you will earn some good karma for it.
The rest of the day went pretty well. It was good to be home but I remained on my feet to cook dinner (which was a new "made up" recipe that was of Asian variety - thanks Dad and Twila for the yummy roasted garlic and peanut sauce. A HIT). After dinner, we settled on the couch for a mini Ghosthunter marathon before heading to bed.
So, my gym reflections...I am noticing that I sweat more than anyone else in that place in the mornings. It makes me feel like I have some sort of condition. I run HARD for 2 miles (about to bump it to 3 next week) and end up sweating from every orifice of my body including my elbows!! I look around and I feel like that I walked into an assisted living community with made up women wearing their best Sunday polo and walking pant! Sorry, I am not trying to be mean but I feel kinda manly walking through with my sweaty tanks (which I buy in the men's department at W Mart) and my muscle arms (if I do say so myself..haha). As I am running on the treadmill so hard I spit sweat, the little yoga class is taking place with people on one leg pointing their delicate hands to the gods above. I am not trying to say that they aren't working out hard. Maybe hard for them. And, for the love of bread, I am thrilled to see the seniors of our society take control of their health! I admire that! My Grandparents are gym-aholics and I couldn't be prouder. But I just feel very...sweaty around them.
The other thing, and I mentioned it before, is the locker room situation. In the midst of my commuting to and from my gorilla shower, I saw BY ACCIDENT ONLY (trust me) a handful of women that are way too comfortable with their bodies. Good for them...bad for me! One was an old "grandma" lady that just walked slowly around completely naked...BLAH!! Please put a long shirt on or something!!! You think you now have a visual you'd like to forget...you have NO idea!!
Regardless, I do enjoy working out in the mornings with my tunes. I do get to work out with Amber on Mondays which is a great catch up session. Otherwise, it is me and my playlist rocking out some GREAT workouts! I have actually lost 5 more lbs!! I think it is my new cardio routine that I do every day plus all of the leafy green salads I have been loving lately.
My workout routine:
Everyday - 2 miles of jogging mixed with sprinting
Mon - leg weight training
Tue - biceps/triceps
Wed - back/chest
Thur - shoulders
Everyday - abs for 20 min
Everyday - bike for 15 min on hills at level 5
I will be getting back to Lorraine's kickboxing class Saturday! I am really looking forward to it but it will be a bummer that Amber won't be there. She has to work on Saturday's. So that will make it a 5 day a week gym routine. Weekdays I am there for about 1.5 hours.
Enough about me and the like. I am going to hop off of here and get some dusting and vacuuming done before the kiddo gets here. I am making the ol' standby chicken tenders, mac and cheese, etc for tonight's dinner. Tomorrow night I am making my own mini sliders with cheese! Tay is going to help me. She and I are going to get out of Daddy's hair tomorrow and go shopping for his VDay and BDay gifts from her. Saturday I am hitting the gym and then we are going to T's step brother's wedding at T's Dad's house. Happy VDay to us! Haha! Our first one as Spencers and we have to go to a wedding. We are taking Tay home after that. Sunday we are helping Amber move out of her apartment into her own space! I know that will make her feel sooooo much better and I am glad. It is important to me to see her smile! We are sisters from another time, we're sure!
So, hopefully this long a$# blog will hold everyone for a couple of days. I will try to hop on when I can but it will certainly be a busy weekend. HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY! XOXOXO!
1 comment:
Hello..welcome to Walmart! I was considering being a Walmart greeter until i read this entry..Mr. Magoo, really? I guess i meet all the specs..old,blind,dropout...and i would greet the same person over and over...plus i'm qualified to clean the restrooms. I was kidding just not too long ago at work about becoming a greeter since the Archdiosese has put a freeze on pay raises for the next year. I had said that now i had become officially an older person on a "fixed-income" that that should qualify me for the position of "greeter" at Walmart! Your discription has convinced me that i am indeed overly-qualified! Anyway, i understand what you're say'n 'bout the hairy shower stalls, but you don't know how bad it can be..us Walmart greeters have to deal with the fact that the hair in the stall is ours and the more we bathe the more we have to deal with! And sweat!!!..you want to talk 'bout sweat? I can sweat in a snow storm..have thought 'bout drinking Old Spice to compromise the problem but so far its only been the Captain..seems to make it better if only in my mind. Again, sorry 'bout the genes..good lord, you must've got em all! Now you're tell'n me that you've been have'n pee-panics...what's Dad's favorite room in any building, fun park, or zoo? You're a chip off the old chunk..but you can spell..how'd that happen? I avoid 90% of the english vocabulary simply because of my bad spelling..my puncuation is mostly dots and i rarely ever write in more than one paragraph if it's ten pages long...where'd you learn this stuff? You are from Kentucky, right? Anyone could tell you are just from what you said 'bout having patience in the parking lot and letting the other guy go first..we are a friendly lot. Anyway..(dot-dot)..enjoyed the read..have fun with Tatum and with the moving..gotta go write a letter..aaats, DAD
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